ladykurana:

Sun Star Stationery Rainbow Moon Chalice paper clip holder. Released August 2015.

IM LOSING IT OVER THIS PIECE OF MERCHANDISE IN PARTICULAR

Uranus and Neptune have finally found the Holy Grail. They effectively sacrificed their lives in its name, and were willing to take any and every pure heart with them. They wonder what kind of mystical powers it must hold to possess such a significant force in their lives.

ITS A GODDAMN PAPERCLIP HOLDER

“Paperclips can easily be held by many other things,” complains Neptune.

“This isn’t even a particularly efficient container,” adds Uranus. “What a waste of a tacky cup.”

BUT WAIT

THESE ARE NOT JUST ANY PAPERCLIPS

THESE ARE DESIGNER PAPERCLIPS

THESE PAPERCLIPS ARE SHAPED LIKE LITTLE STARS AND MOONS

THERE ARE, LIKE, TWENTY OF THEM

WAS IT WORTH THE POTENTIAL LIVES OF THE INNOCENTS

WAS IT WORTH YOUR OWN SOULS

JUST LOOK AT THOSE NOVELTY PAPERCLIPS

WHY ARE THERE SO MANY MAGICAL ROCKS IN THIS SHOW

“That’s right, Sailor Moon: The only way to end this eternal galaxy war is to stab a bitch.”

so this is our next magic artifact

Sailor Moon’s new magic wand sounds exactly like an electronic alphabet learning toy I used to have when it was running out of batteries.

so she powers up her scepter by making it longer with the power of love

carry on there is nothing freudian about this

“Continuity is for nerds,” whispered Sailor Moon as she summoned two Moon Kaleidoscopes without the aid of Pegasus.

“Black Dream Hole? Sailor Moon, sounds like a job for your Rod of Love!”
“I got rid of that weapon in season 3—”
“DO IT FOR THE PUN”

“This pie chart and this trend-line graph have told me everything I need to know about the enemy’s tactics!”

“Oh, vaguely Germanic clock. You never cease to amuse with your strange foreshadowing.”